Monday, April 16, 2012

Swap Shoes


If you feel the need to say or do something, yet your primary concern is not putting your foot in things/causing trouble/upsetting someone/letting sleeping dogs lie, consider first if the roles were reversed. Would you want someone to inform you, and if YES, how would YOU want to hear it?
There are three ways of pointing something out to someone.


1) There's the abrupt way, which will raise hackles and defences. This can have it's value. As behind ones defences things still sink in and depending on the person may or may not be acted upon. If the person is surrounded by fears, this approach can cause retreat and arguments.


2) There's the subtle way, making suggestions, yet not really getting to the point and just hoping that the person will get the hint. This too can have its value, as all things are absorbed in time. Eventually that person will think things were their idea!


3) The honest approach, saying 'Look, I don't want to interfere but feel I must just say this'. 
Be sincere, understand who they are and if you remain calm, if you can refrain from making any judgements and criticisms of that person, then honesty can have immediate power. ... Do be careful that you are being truly honest though, be sure that what you are suggesting isn't about YOU, for your benefits of motives, otherwise it can easily turn into the abrupt approach and cause more agro. Be aware that no one likes to be judged or told what to do.


Honesty, truly is the best policy...

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