Friday, June 15, 2007

Self Confidence Solution


Many people are involved in relationships that are strained, whether husband/wife, parent/child, or just ordinary friendships. If someone wanted to go about improving the relationship, what incentives would you suggest they use as a means of fortifying their resolve to succeed?

Utilizing incentives and motivational tools provides the inner stamina needed to maintain our willpower, and thus achieve our ultimate goals.

To all the questions... I will say SELF CONFIDENCE...

Self confidence is an attitude which allows individuals to have positive yet realistic views of themselves and their situations. Self-confident people trust their own abilities, have a general sense of control in their lives, and believe that within reason, they will be able to do what they wish, plan and expect. Having self-confidence does not mean that individuals will be able to do everything. Self-confident people have expectations that are realistic. Even when some of their expectations are not met, they continue to be positive and to accept themselves...

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Be a good negotiator...



To be able to communicate effectively, you need to be honest and open about your feelings, needs and ideas, whilst also accepting, respecting and supporting the other person. Empathise with the person by trying to imagine how they must be feeling – which may be different to how you would feel in the same situation. This may help you to hear and understand the problem from other person’s perspective.

We do not always have to agree with each other; what makes us so unique as human beings is that we all see things differently and this is part of what makes our relationships precious. Relationships are about learning how to nurture and love ourselves as well as others. In order to take care of yourself, you must be responsible for your own needs and set your own personal boundaries.

The collaborative problem-solving steps:

•Define the problem in terms of the needs of both parties.
•Brainstorming, develop possible solutions together.
•Break up the problem in smaller and more manageable portions.
•Find best alternatives and make a decision.
•Evaluate how well the solution turned out.

When feeling are expressed, heard and accepted by another person, then individuals can discuss their differences more productively. Once the emotions have subsided, problems can be solved by the collaborative problem solving skills.

I find it worth sharing to you all. Readfull article...

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Mentoring Relationship

We all happen to think why the relationship has turned out this complex when we can not figure out the reason for happening so... there are reasons and clashes but are they enough to bring a loving relation to this stage...

I think we missed quite a few things that would have made us skip a situation of a broken relationship of our life.

When you show up for every meeting with your loved one and strive to make things work out you send your loved one a strong message that you care and that he or she is worth caring about... so just be there

“My parents lecture me all the time. Why would I want my mentor to be the same way? I have the best mentor in the program, but sometimes he tries too hard to be a mentor instead of just being himself. What I mean is that he thinks he always has to share some wisdom or advice, when sometimes I would rather just kick it and joke around.”

Of course, when your loved one comes to you for help or advice, it is appropriate to help them develop solutions. It's also okay to check in with them if you suspect that they are struggling with something. They just don't want non-stop advice. So, take the pressure off of yourself and just enjoy your loved one's company.
be a friend, not an all-knowing authority

The best that you can do is to lead by example. By becoming a mentor, you've already modeled the most important thing a human being can do: caring about another. Here are some other ways you can be a positive role model for your loved one:

• Keep your word: Call when you say you will. Do what you say you will. Be there when you say you will;
• Return phone calls and e-mails promptly;
• Have a positive outlook;
• If your program has group sessions, participate fully;
• If you enter a competitive activity with your loved one, keep it in perspective and by all means do not cheat (or even fudge a little) to help your loved one win, get a better place in line at an event, etc.; and
• Let your loved one see you going out of your way to help others.

I think it works...Be a role model...

Few of what is concurred by California Governor’s Mentoring Partnership and Los Angeles Youth Mentoring Connection also...

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